Sta.sh
Opening
Today's civilization is somehow synthetic,which is finite.People that you see on the street bear time as decay,first their bodies then their spirit.You see history as the ancient egyptians want you to see past,present and future because is their synthetic breakthrough concept.And they placed their concepts of life and death in history.Smart move.As a result their dead spirit lives today.It's the analytic breakthrough I'm interested in and this one takes place in France,Europe with Descartes.The world of the machines you see today sprouted as mere applications in this synthetic world of the analytical mind.The industrial revolution in Europe that followed the analytical cracking of the synthetic world,which is God's world was quickly understood by the European powers at that time.'Cogito,ergo sum' is the thought that opens up modernity with a new problem.Is whether we rationalize life or we leave it to develop in a synthetic way.Synthetic is to be a science,think at all the Greek culture who developed tools for understanding reality.One problem puzzles me,whether another species are analytic or synthetic.Carbon based life forms are synthetic but think of a race that is based on silicium and is analytical entirely.What is their universe looking like?Now,if you grow a synthetic culture to a purpose or an end,lets imagine we build a rationalized universe as once the greek culture wanted but failed,you will get the same tools for the understanding of the universe,only these tools will be tuned for a synthetic carbon based life form.
The cell's constructs
The self or all the other identities with functions of a centre are semantic constructs of the cell.They belong to it no matter how confident we are when we are talking about them.On their behalf and with their help we have built a symbolic reality characterised by a boundless linguistic game as long as it radiates from our self or selves.The organic support of the universe is devoid of identity itself and self-sufficient enough to remain alive through cell division.Its attributes are recognizable in the genetic heritage of early life.That is why life is everywhere the same in the universe from its origin.Life in this universe is a physical constant.What is special and pleads for an identity is the formula of life.The Earth is the melting pot of diversity of this formula, perhaps other planets also host a much simpler formula composed of a single cell that knows only the edges of the horizon of that planet.Such a form of life would not know the phenomenon of death.Death as a phenomenon explains why a cell found in its division a way of life through individuals.The centre of an individual isn't the the cell or its division,but the semantical construct,the fact that we can talk about ourselves endlessly, referring to ourselves as centers.What we don't know is that apart from the singularity of an individual in the world he builds consciously with each concept, conditions for sustaining a self-sufficient life.The individual is the tool of life.When it comes to human life its uniqueness is the last thing we think about.Medicine,law or science work with tools that fit the specifics of life between a set of coordinates we believe by virtue of their generality that they keep the most conducive to life.What is mutually shared that maintains life is recognizable in a short time.Continuity of these sciences and the instrumental spell that has inspired life by its safety, cannot be ruled out today.
Organic gravity
When you descent enough into organic,you become spectator at your own blood flow, there is no turning back,you raise your life to the rank of an absolute experience, you've paid your return ticket to its performance and you become afterwards witness to the competitive organization of life.This revolves around your own atoms and if you link these atoms to a single physical gravity other than your own,the organic gravity will collapse, everything will be doomed to an awful lot, despair and its support,pessimism.We can find in history the same auspices under the greek culture.
Hierarchy of needs
Your will to represent the others in your conscious will always notify the world of each other presence in the world.But will this world need more personnel, and if so, under which lacking if not of desire then of a weak will.Or is it the lack of labor force?This usage has at its root the desire to be represented into the world,a constituting human desire without the inner hierarchy.And as long as you are enslaved by your desire caught in that image which is your representation and the world your representation you will be enslaved by any possible worlds around you.But there is at last hope,in the suspension of desire.Is this the hope of the world or of a better world?Undoubtedly not.Because the world cannot suspend itself or by whosoever desires so.The world creates dependency around it but also selection.Fighting all alone against a constituent worlds of a working principle of beings that comprise it it's only revealing pain, torment and temptation, a little too close to everything the Saints felt by rejecting their desires.Selection confirms the rule, however, the world is my representation and so it should remain.For nobody to break the mastery of the self requires a differentiation in the human condition that later will change into a hierarchy.We can make an analogy with the castes of India.You will find voices, in particular on the european continent to challenge an issue of an order in the name of equal rights, either of chance or for work, isn't it the same thing?It's a cruel world they all say basically not knowing about what world is all about.Rising at the height required by the time of his predecessors, Nietzsche puts the presence of the others in his representation of the world, presence that requires a whole new phenomenon, the will of power.Alone,my will makes it possible the meeting of the two superimposed worlds but without an order is impossible to determine a hierarchy that will be trampled on by the power of the human will that thus will have appropriated the world through representation.
Cloning time
I'm the memory of some foreign beings,dependent on static since time immemorial when life was hiding in shells.I kept alive the remembering of the tools of making spiral shells.In themselves time shall be aggregated with each circular motion around your life.When you have a shell attached to your back alike snails, time belongs to you and doesn't alienate you from its fossilized essence.Part of you,time defends your life whenever time and life are all the same,when time works at maintaining life and vice versa,life is the image of time.That life originated in the dark has the evidence of life's propensity to protect itself in shells, under the scales or in caves,in hideouts,or igloos.There you find life but in the dark and it approaches time as you move up to its complexity.And if such a life assumes the risk of exposing itself to light,will burn in its ailing radiation giving birth to mutations.As we move away from the Sun we get closer to the original formula of life.In fact life mutates from its inception when it found a stable chemical formula and a reproductive one to represent it.But the core of all carbon-based life forms remains the same,it belongs to an individual only temporarily,time being the essence that alienates life by the action of an individual existence.And the action of the individual tends to preserve the finality of life.The cause of this action remains unclear to this day, it tends to something that doesn't contain it.If you study all the fossils found on Earth,you will learn that life has used every means to reflect time.Life began to divide itself with time but it is impossible for individuals to wear the mark of the same time.Here comes the reality of our senses that diversify our temporality.Is there anything outside the shell,outside time?This is the common ground for any living being.Why is it there?No one can give a definite answer.There are identical structures that protect each other and different structures that tend to hide from one another.The crucible of all temporal existence is the plurality of individuals where these meet eachother.In reality we all ask the right to live.However, these facts do not stand in front of the cloning technology into identical individuals.The problems are not so much of ethical nature as the realistic opportunity to sustain a livelihood which refuses the plurality through the very denial of the existence of the individual structure of life.Clones have big problems with the nervous system, there isn't a reality that can support a altered psychological structure.The need of a clone may not have a corresponding in the structure of reality or reality asks of a clone a need this cannot bear, the adherence to the temporal.That's why any cloning is a success over time.
Letter to a friend
My dear friend,I've lost many battles in my life that only have made me stronger for the times to come.But these times never came.I caged myself into an iron box,no one can break,not even the strongest sedatives.It was a defensive mechanism.I discovered my being in a time that revolved around me,helpless,defenseless and I turned my gaze from it.It was a mistake,I coudn't interpret it's sexual behavior.I couldn't find my being in it.I shattered this illusion,the indians call maya.There is no way to live in time only if you make it yourself,if you break its boundaries.I think at times that I'm part of the pyramids in Egypt or a stone in Stonehenge,something that possesses a power beyond time only to feed the imagination of those who think of themselves free beings in front of the immortals.My time now has clay feet,cannot move and it's stuck in a moment of contemplation.I can reach your thoughts even miles away only to see a world left in decay,remnants of a time when Gods have walked amidst humans.Gods need no language to love their creations.They are highly esthetic beings in love with the beauty of this world they think their own.And beauty we possess,whether is inner or in our sight.I had my moments of revelation when put in front of a panorama of a city like Tel Aviv I could hear its screaming.This city is in pain,I felt it there lying on the beach.Cold structures,skyscrapers,a money built society that is poorer than arhaic ages for it pursues wealth not really enjoying it.When you build something of concrete you get closer to your death,actually you live in a mummified environment.Today's tombs are the largest metropolises.I hope your departure into the mountains may bring you the deepest thoughts on humanity,a freed from all your demons you carry inside helped by sedatives and fought by a great consciousness of our time.
Triumph of the will
They lose themselves in this world and this allows them what is thought to be their freedom for there is no respect for a life of integrity.The life of Jesus was to his crucifixion worth living.Beyond God's word they discovered their emptiness,few believed in its glory.When you refuse to formulate thoughts,when you have surpass their need for living, you discover that you place yourself alone in life,you take life as it is,not hating yourself but in its awe.Because words defeat your self,they control your hate.I crossed the threshold of the most precise expressions and I found their end.I buried a world created by words.In the beginning there was the word and the word was God.At the end there was life eternal.And this life you don't live through words.Life doesn't comprehend God.Treading on God's death you receive the eternal life of one that has his self.This is the meaning of Christ's resurrection, the meaning of a faith that went beyond the beginning and found itself beyond the word of God in life.
Let your words come to me.I want to teach you how to overcome them through life.In the beginning there was the word of God, and the word loved to do the Lord's work but crucified by people understood in the end that his life was not the word.He learned that people hurt, sacrificing himself, being and using words as tools.He would have been crucified by their word in common agreement with life.For only on the cross you overcome the beginning and find out that the word stays away from life.The Word no longer helps the crucified One.
The triumph of the will it's the perfection and the ultimate expression of the christian life.It took the death of God on the cross for man to possess his will.Will is one whether divine or human.In the chronological sense, life is the expression of the will.
Radioactive heaven
All the space of our universe is radioactive. Here is a false assumption contradicted by a prejudice as simple as possible, life eternal.One question is raised: is there in the universe a space to react with it? The response of a mind which is venturing beyond the light is that yes, there is eternal life in the hypothesis of a non-radioactive space.But lets drop the term forever for a moment, and we'll find out after centuries of scientific searches that the material of which consists the living matter is a result of an explosion of a sun, that summarizes a long range of radiations. Life itself is bio-energy, inhabited by atoms,essentially is radiation and if it is drawn up after a celestial model of a stars has a beginning and an end of a consumption. Here, however, a simple prejudices may put into question the scientific foundation of the universe. How is it possible that life eternal to exist and where we find this space free of radiations? If not in this universe then where else? Another question is raised, why we burden a life made from organic material if after all faiths and religions eternity is something that we access after death. Life begins,consumes itself and dies in radioactivity. Light has reached spaces far beyond life and so will do one day life itself.. But what if the light will be reaching due to man a space inaccessible to man, life eternal? Science will light one day man's life, his searches, will give all his questions an answer only that despite its tool,the light, the methodology and its purpose will have substituted man already.
Hollywood dementia
Killing must give you the same thrill as sex.I don't know which of the two impulses is the strongest one but murder is as natural as sex for me.The more you perform it the better expert you become in one of them.The exceed of morality throught sexual orgies or mass genocide is desirable.Both are never to be together in a society where men become women's slaves under the sex burden.With their emancipation through pornography it died their admiration of man.Classical manhood is long forgotten,the one in which the woman was property of his genitalia.
The deified one
Easy steps will follow him soon into the desert, where you go to the deepest of ravines that have swallowed the unfortunate ones.There in the depth of darkness they groan with pain,down there the stones retain from their suffering a wave of silence impregnated now on their dead,decomposing faces that resonate in deafening echoes between the steep walls of the abyss.Their curse is perpetuated in the world with every wave that moan quietly,shaping a world pass into darkness through the last final gesture of the collapsed.An obscene gesture passes the living into non-existence, the pain into silence, solitude in a grimace.To bend the truth about this abyss of humanity when you are on the brim of its bleeding lip,on the edge where everything is resolved spontaneous,you simply refuse to save them from the grasp of despair of those thoughts that were born out of fear in the face of death when looking how to keep, like the people who discovered the fire, this time your life.Those who use their powers beyond understanding are called gods, others left in distress will perish.This contrast that draws the world is called duality.The essence of the world lies in opposition,otherwise there isn't eye for knowledge. I sit now all alone guarding the wood which flickers slowly,maintained only by the the memory of the extinct but necessary ones before my deification.I will take the firebrand into the abyss,I will rummage through their bones for a human skeleton model that has set himself free in this world.When it will take consistency and the pieces are complete, I will show him before you under the form of a totem.People will venerate knowledge again, people will love him more precious than life, the earth will deify.
The egg
In her womb there is an egg.Having a Christ in every ... yellow round.The shape of this prophecy is circular, closes life both with the beginning and the end and opens later the cross path for each synthetic egg. We are born welcomed in the world at a time, hatching in the warmth of a tradition we are going to fulfill with the history of a path of love for the others.But in the end the egg no longer recognizes himself on the cross as master on a holy tradition.He broke from tradition when he loved what overflowed into the identical,the one and truly God.Everything was one as in the beginning,spoken word and fulfilled at once.It is the law he broke through a blind faith in them. I made them free beings, and I taught them that love causes creation,names it besides God never as a blind submission on behalf of a law that binds us tightly to each other canceling our creative potentialities that lie dormant in the dogmatic slumber that defines the verb to be until the dawn of a new religion of love will cease our suffering.Everyone's life begins only once and it is made from the start to cry its heart out how painful is in the world to be hatched in love with the brothers that you see them identical with you. We are born with God by his will, besides all the way along the cross that is so hard to follow when we are asked for the sincerity of our hearts. Locked hard from the moment we glimpsed a feeling of slavery for our identity in the world,we start our lives on a path of a love that does not have ourselves. Instead it has everyone's God, sharing his grace to each other on parallel roads as far as they all lead to a center of your self. Our lives are parallel, only the spoken word and fully understood by each other on the cross in the allknowledge of God directs our lives to the center of love, the same for everyone who turned out from themselves radiating love from the heart center of self salvation.
An egg that puts in the center the self interrogation is as corrupt by the organic as the sensual pleasures in the placenta will determine later its becoming of its own being in the world through the power to subdue.His love is still for himself, lay in the darkness of the womb where life begins to feel himself worthy of the light that will accede at a term that is natural.Everything alive keeps its integrity even in its absence.That long awaited day begins its labor at the end of which, tired, light shows to a world left in obscurity.He wasn't born, but aborted.
Versus idealism
We witnessed the degradation of the idealism of Germanic origin when it ceased to be a reckoning force in people's lives.Did this idealism justify on behalf of which happened crimes against humanity,the long wanted desire of cultural supremacy of Germany in Europe during the Second World War? This idealism doesn't live today not even among the neo-nazi groups.We have denied all of it as a false paradigm for what could again draw people than the fear of another war led in its name, this time on an individual level.The romantic idealism remains in history as the engine of a high culture, to which we have escaped its coercion, however, we know to avoid it.Nowadays culture has its definite place, away from those tendencies of domination at which bow all those who walk on its territory.High culture was hidden to the meaning of the world and was beheaded of the once proud,considered by example a Beethoven boldly in the choice of whom devoted his musical pieces.Nietzsche's figure grows once again on the grave of the transcendental idealism,he was first to denied it, fulfilling the prophecy of his death which was not far from us.God is dead, however we try to resuscitate him.The therapy of language healed those who have dropped into the trap of these concepts without end:thing in itself, truth, idea,spirit,etc.The romantic idealism answers all these challenges bravely, with his youthful pride that he took in charge to base the modern science.Everything was lost after a century when he was hermeneutically cracked in postmodernism and lost its genuine expression.
Kingdom of heaven
The kingdom of conscience is the result that followed the encounter of europeans with genuine judaism during the crusades,Christ doesn't speak anywhere in the Gospels of such a kingdom.The judaic phenomenon couldn't be denied,it was something that happened.Nihilism denies this very thing,the fact that we couldn't deny it and to annul the importance of Christ in history.At the contact with Him arose in Europe a kingdom of conscience ,the last manifestation of this kingdom,nihilism and the mask of Nietzsche who announced the death of God,the fact that we couldn't for so many centuries escape His coercion,denial we are indebted to with the emergence of the kingdom of conscience.
All that we know
Knowledge beyond what is given in the world ascribes to concepts as thing in itself, God,spirit the explanation of non-existing phenomena.The critic of pure reason put bounds over the possibility of reason of knowing such given phenomena.God must be given in the world in order to know Him,any means to glimpse It, whether called revelation, prayer, religious experience,doesn't bring you anywhere near him.
We know all the sensory data that our bodies at the interaction with the environment they produce? How can we complete the knowledge of the environment? Knowledge can overcome the environment that produced it,in turn knowledge cannot produce healthy environments.After Cioran knowledge is a curse, (who knows how hard it is to have a conscience?), after Nietzsche, an incurable disease (how many years it took me to my recovery?). Under what conditions is knowledge possible?
Free to choose
I haven't met in my wanderings in the history of the spirit a mental strong enough to resist the temptation of flesh,a conscience which builds its sense beyond desire in an absolute no way fad or austere,vague and undefined but walked among the too-worldly, a mundaneity of a semi - god. Blessed with madness, Nietzsche somewhat closed himself to that state of psychic tension that instead to animate his desires has revealed a world of impersonal wills that animates any accidental conglomeration of cells, a world in which every motion or altering of the conservation status tends to domination, this is the living expression at Nietzsche. But to get to the reality of this unchaining of the living, the crushing of it under the constant fire of doubt until the revelation of a world animated by impersonal forces clashing constantly creating tense realities broke the deterministic spectrum of a mental life attached too human-like to this world. For to step beyond and to remain suspended where any drama is impossible, where every trace of living is severely punished isn't the bias of a spirit that thought himself too liberal? Free of choice, free in front of all options that opened before your, going along and alone on this way of life ,vehemently denying all logic creations, all those terminus points of thinking when put in front of them you face a wall as before you finally understand the enigma of the spirit,that you have to risk,what?,only your consciousness maybe, that if you don't choose to turn your eyes from the truth and to look back to the difficult road that leads to the principle of non-contradictory and doing so to shatter it. And then all those who made the wall,as they say,turned their eyes back,they understood the big benefit of the measure of their ignorance, nothing but the foundation of things, a look of an all-knowing, a certainty so relentless that this is the measure of things,that's the way they arise as an opposite of each other. With such certainty Socrates seduced most of the Athenians. And Socrates was given to deliver,God forbade him to give birth, Kierkegaard reminds us.We says that we cannot choose what kind of children we'll have. Each birth is the result of arbitrariness. A logical step in its territory mean, Nietzsche says,that we must admit one more fiction, that of a priori synthetic judgments, and Nietzsche refused to take it into possession, to know the rule of this other world beyond. Perhaps his spirit did not need to soothe his labor in an unconditional much too uncertain prefering a bit of certainty to an abundance of beautiful possibilities. But let's close all possibilities and firmly anchor ourselves in time,be more careful with it,for we don't want to smash it,break it into pieces,ultimately we are humans, not dynamite.
Mirror,mirror...
A coherent theoretical system that adds nothing to the explanation of the world is actually equivalent to the the world.In fact it’s the mirror image of the world.Physical laws don’t describe reality but tune it to a theoretical system that is the image of the world in a mirror.There a physicist will discern the static and the movement of the image, a logician will isolate the identity of the image,an artist will see the color and composition.But few will accede to a truth for which the mirror image of the world lies in an absence .Man has always understood to cover this lack with fictions, complementing its image to completely saturation.For everything lies in details and when someone discovers a new look and even somewhat grotesque that simplifies things than the mirror reflects the power of judgement of that man.The fascination of such an image in the mirror is in the correspondence with reality.But isn’t it so, when we look in the mirror our imagination tends to fly and some people even fall in love with what they see in there, strong anchoring themselves in reality, in other words they work to transform their image in the world by means of the mirror.The mirror helps to fulfill the predictions that people inlove make regarding their own image, how must they appear before the world.It’s somewhat strange to be present only in the mirror,it’s what Kierkegaard callls the esthetic stage of man.The passing to the ethical stage cannot be done in front of the mirror.It’s a virtue that lies hidden,doesn’t show itself.Good,if such a thing exist in the world,should be visible and appear in the mirror, which doesn’t happen.Missing quality,the good receives from people a fictional use.
The dogmatic fortress
The dogmatic fortress stands proud in front of me like a virgin.Master on myself I take the first steps inside.A rarefied air and a deadly silence surround me.It's far from what I have expected.Here inside nothing has life,nothing breaths.A mysterious force pulls me inside confusing my senses as I totter carefully towards the sanctuary.Here I was told I will find the wizard.The wizard's truth I knew it very well.There,locked hard between his objects this one contemplated in his self the ultimate truths he touched in his absence in the world,unquestionable truths given the necessity associated with during their configuration as objects of thinking.Like any dogmatic who seized the truth through a sustain effort of will,destitute of freedom inside a absolute alterity,the wizard followed to seduce me with his truths,to fall into the trap he set for me.Behind all these there it was,his mask.There i needed to unveil his artificial world,this self-sufficient world without any threads with reality.I was sent with a firm mission .The wizard's head has to fall.
What I was confronted with I hadn't the smallest idea.The prejudice urged me to believe that dogmatism was the safest ground possible but in the same time the most barren.Nobody could quench his thirst of knowledge walking into the dogmatic desert.The wizard must know without fail this truth,at least he is true with himself,the source is too salty for other to quench their thirst.He was awaiting for me and I knew most of the seekers who never came back to reality after entering the dogmatic fortress,facing the wizard.I knew also all the traps set behind those the mask of the wizard was hidden.The wizard is dead for the world,this cannot see his face.That's why he wears a mask.The meta-physical truth he came to doesn't need proselytes,it's there standing stiff,self-sufficient and it's hard to distinguish between truth and being.Dogma and wizard are one.
All these words,self-sufficient,superabundance,try to reproduce an existence closed in itself to a high degree contemplative given the fact that the relationship between wizard and the world has been suspended by virtue of an impossible:the reality.What's left behind of a flood?Same happened with the wizard:negation was the flood that drowned reality and buried an entire world.He lives now only for the splendour of his bright ego
I'm in the middle of the fortress and every movement I make is becoming heavier,my legs are clay.I'm under the wizards spell,a powerful spell which hardly can I break.And wasn't the fate of my predecessors who faced the wizard to fall in dogmatism as long as they thought they accomplish in this their will of power over themselves?The dogmatic being is a moral person,narrow minded and aware of his narrowness ready to offer his morality services to those thirsty of eternity.
I'm looking for the place the wizard is hidden,only unveiling his mask the questionings and the conversation with yourself will begin.A general survey shows me the traps set by the wizard.The mask is behind the dogmas.These self-sufficient truths you cannot touch even with your eyes and if you do the pain it gives you it will increase you tenfold as a being.The world a dogmatic creates is independent,beyond your control from which the illusion of freedom blends the items together in your conscience.
I'm here to fulfill your will,I finally hear the wizard's voice.I cannot resist temptation.A new life according to my duty I have towards myself,this is what I expected from the wizard,wisdom.
It is too late.I can't go back.The fortress closed its gates, I'm caught inside and the wizard's truths I thought presents in the beginning now burn my flesh.I cannot move.Then I hear the wizard's laughter.I felt into the wizard's trap and he's about to transform me into an object.Terrified I'm trying to communicate with him but my words fade in out,the wizard is silent,he's just a mask.My transformation in a tag has begun.In a few minutes I will set traps for the wizard to those thirsty of knowledge.From all my being there will be left nothing more than a clue to the wizard.I'm about to transform myself into a dogma,this poisonous gift I will delude with those who think that will find the kind in all its wisdom.
-Where are you?I ask with a last strain.
-I'm everywhere in my dogmas,I hear a thunderous voice.Your transformation has begun and when completed you will share with me the same conscience adding to my dowry a new category.Your freedom was nothing more than a humour,a first step of weakness.Others will come and will fall into succession one after another until the necessity will pass to a conceptual level.There we will be one.
I fall to the ground in front of his truth.The conversation with myself has already begun:God allows the explanation of the world as totality but totality doesn't explain God.Aggregation is necessary for the human intellect and practice action,God isn't therefore your freedom to conceive God as totality is given to you.
The tatoo
A crossed spider,some say that lethal,lowers himself from the the ceiling and increases in volume over an anti-Christ,choking his guts crossed in a prayer. Breaking with his claw foot after another until it falls out of balance decreasing on the abdomen of this dark beast.This looks through the optical prisms of his visual acuity at the life that struggles helpless in halos.No one wants to help,rather wants its extinction in infra-red.With every unfulfilled desire, his soul is slipping into the abyss of evil. It's where he finds similarity to the blue irises.He stretched his hand to the claw in the darkness and in the last moment of hope he glimpsed a sense among the lives of the others. Nothing uplifting in the failure of the act of self-determination with the others,nothing despicable in the satiety of a decadent self.He pulls himself along with the one who knows him by heart and takes his soul in a mirror in his arms.He moves to the right,then to the left that may emerge the systemic excrescences that will recognize immediately as being broken from both by fear. And evil is happening in the cold image.Here is another self on his back that has a heart tattooed in a mirror. If you look through infra-red lenses you can discern the black ink tears and realize that there is the entrance in the court of his secrets only to join but you must assimilate the skill of a souls technician.The other has himself,you don't have you,you say to you and your eyes peer a strange tattoo on your left hand:it's is an anti-Christ out there!
The vaccine
They made me a vaccine against the most pure of my emotions and I feel now only at the second person.You are an alien,distant from the world and game in the evening by dead souls. We see more clearly who you are now that you are immunized against your wickedness. In extending of my left hand grows a shell and on the retina lies a network of barbed wire.You have broken clear attributes from me and you have mastered standing absolutes and still evil you remained.You distanced from me when I refused to uncover my ugliness in front of you. With chosen words I continued to show you what it means to have compassion.When I see life through your eyes the self mastery of the killer terrifies me. This is not possible,cannot take place. It's just a crime,you say.I'm a deaf toy to the calls of those who remained alone. Pulsating with guilt and shame in a creature I'm hiding from you,I do not want to see my reddened face.Perhaps it's measles and nothing else you say. But you don't persuade me at all, measles is contagious, it's from you that I got it.
Back to theology
It's foundation lies in the opening words of God in the holy Bible.When God finally worked out the white man he exclaimed: Oh my God,what have I done!I'm brilliant.And then he created Adam,who turned his back on Him.The white monkey,after Darwin,started epic battles throughout history with Adam's descendants to impose the true nature of God.In this battles he discovered the truth about his nature Adam once knew but hid from the world.This nature is one with God and is now opened to anyone.
What do you mean? Could you explain that a little farther. Are the Gentiles the angels and demons with the most knowledge or does India and the East control privileges to the tree of life?
You did realize I linked the old text of Bhagavad Gita with the Bible.The epic battles that took place long before Buddha's coming in the Indian culture(world) tell us about a truth you will encounter later on the frontispiece of the oracles throughout Greece:Know yourself.After Indians what will always prevail in the world is nature.But there is a hint in Bhagavad Gita about this nature:heroes learn in the end that they fought their own kin,brothers,sisters,fathers,mothers.Is what psychoanalysis in the late thirties called the God complex.
You know that every evolution of the human nature is painful as hell.But this is not the nature of our heart but of our brains.Heart keep us linked with the purity of the other we conceive as our God.That is why we fall inlove with eachother.Bhagavad Gita lacks this understanding.Only the Bible brings it into questioning.
This is where I stood few nights ago.You can see in this picture I made that man has nowhere to go.You have only two options,go back or fall.And then happened,I fell.There is a precise similarity with one of Jesus temptation on the mountain.He also fell into an abyss only to be brought back to light be the angels in his heart.The body never survives the fall.From that moment on you are either an angel or a demon.
You know why Adam and Eve covered their genitals in front of God's eyes,they wanted a blood line in paradise,to celebrate sex inside heaven;back on Earth sex has always been a ritual.As a jew Jesus wanted to keep the blood line network inside the jew community.It's quite funny how Christians turned Jesus,a walking God into a spiritual guru.The holy spirit is shared but must be within a blood line.This gave birth to a government which was monarchy in Europe.
The kill paradox
The true nature of freedom arises at the end of an war,afterwards is just slavery to your senses,mind,body you succeeded to protect.One step closer to your freedom is freeing yourself from the other evils.But will you be able to free yourself from yourself,once you eradicate all evil in the world.How can you live among others alike you in a such utopia?Helping each other?This is what Christians did since the beginning of their bloody world,they killed everything that moved.In order to cease suffering Buddha told us not to harm or kill any living creature,I would say,Let's not offend evil,it has its purpose in the world.What you protect in life,your heart,your intellect,will turn on you in the end for these things need to burn,their flames need to rise in the world,to change it at times.If you kill them now worms you don't squash will feast only with your flesh,you will be gone.It's the kill paradox of killing yourself or the Buddha paradox.You can't sleep at night,that's it,you can't kill yourself.
Schizoid scherzo
George used to gaze at the sky from time to time.Everywhere you saw him whether on the street or in his home at his window he saturated his pupils with light.All his being was himself again in the changing formations of clusters.Everything was actual.He was experiencing an expansion of thoughts he had never felt before.A new feeling therefore a new life,he said to him with enthusiasm.He was not aware of the lack of control over this sensation.He was stepping into the darkness of his being.However he was not endangering himself.Not being fully sentimentally mature he could not comprise his feelings.He lost his liberty long time ago and now he was living in the only consequence of his deeds:guilt.
Reality was present in him in a gushing extent.When he reached its peaks seldom he feared of loosing his mind.It was obviously a symptom of madness.When he achieved this is was already too late.He was living under the necessity burden,he knew this would happen,that's why all his exertions were so painful.He learned in time to invert them over himself.Pain of every nature put an end to his struggles.It was now that he could at last close in himself.Master,in possession,words like these were recurring into his mind driving him insane.From now on he could not fight anymore,he was at his wit's end.His life was nothing more than a waisted package he needed to throw at the garbage.Left naked,without shape and voice to be heard.Who to believe him?His ironic laugh gave him away.Then I realized the fundamental error of his judgement:the Ubermensch is not creative rather destructive for the relationship between the creator and his outcome in creation is mediated by his humanity at which the ubermensch has no longer access.
-I have the might to unleash,so much,I cannot close.I don't have the courage to reconsider the moral values.Once I pass the threshold I cannot come back.For me what it starts doesn't have an end.
-Reconsider that you don't start anything,that you are too afraid,I said to him.
-Don't make a mock of me.The consequences doesn't end but with sleep.
-When your friendship or forgiveness are rejected to you the consequences will run over your head in a never ending return of the self-same.You are the mirror reflection of the world.
-I cannot find an end,close the knowledge,my friend.
-You go beyond the veil,you don't stop.Nothing is personal to you,nothing fits you,I reproached him.Come down in time!
-Man is wolf among men.He devours truth,beauty and justice.Live if you can amongst them.
-A touch of idealism I catch in your sight,and for a second I wondered of his attitude.
-The claim to obtain the absolute in immanence is entitled if we give up speech.And I'm talking with you,you understand me,as beasts sniffing eachother's bottoms,he burst into laughter.
Without saying a word I left his room and vexed as I hadn't been before I pointed myself to the central park to clear my memory.I remembered the first time I met him.He was nothing but a sum of spasmodic tics,grimaces and wry faces.He lifted his eyes frightened when you tried to have a conversation with him.His voice,so frail,you would say that he was breaking a spell with every word he uttered.As soon as I reached my apartment I put down on paper some of his words I remembered best:'Man cannot protrude himself' ;'We experience paradise each time the space around us is filled with seeds' ;'The strongest doesn't want to be imitated.Continuity is his own only' ;What good to work these days to?Cultural supremacy is just utopia nowadays'.He was terminated as man.I don't know what he would have done if he hadn't come upon Bruckner.His nervous strain had a correspondent and this saved him.
He started his big built up.He couldn't waist time anymore.He was giving no thoughts to his mortality,it was alien territory for him.He had to do something now and here,not in the real world but with his being.In my essence,there I will find the truth,he said to me once.He was deceived by his own conscience.Even now after all this time I still believe that he wanted to free himself,to overcome his fear.He thought that if he toil hard to his spiritual foundation,at his basis structure as a being he would finally possess the savior.He was working in and not with his self.In the end this road leads to failure.
I hadn't come for five minutes in his room that I realized from the first words we exchanged that he was confused and delirious.
-I don't want to open my eyes anymore,the light is too painful.If it hadn't been for it I would have been most fortunate.All this afternoon I struggled with the pain.It tore my flesh with every second I counted.I cannot fight anymore,I'm at my wits'end.I quitted playing the martyr.I want to take it into possession,to absorb it,to become one with it.I don't save myself if I project it where at least hurts.Pain knows no logic,it's beyond subject and its changing it as it likes,throws it in a whril of colour and after its mood it blackens your sight or it bleeds your conscience.I don't see but this two colours.With time I understood from its recurrent character the meaning of these colours.The recurrence doesn't happen at constant periods but invariable.Pain has moods.I'm more afraid of the red than of black,this one is more humanlike,more decent.Red drives me sometimes insane,gets me to the threshold of insanity.I feel I cannot hold no more.I know I won't find like this any refuge.Pain is one,I'm more than one,I'm complex as personality.So what's left for me to do?I surrender myself to the pain and this divides itself,diminishes in intensity in other words I populate virgin territories of my conscience as green,blue and in a small measure yellow.Everything blends in my sight and if it comes off all right I have access to divinity,if not I'm a dead man.I passed many times beside you God,and near you Lucifer,I won't forget you.I rose above the terminus point and from that height I looked around and what a surprise I had when waking up in the blindmen's world.These men were pushed from behind to fulfil the prophecy,without conscience and madmen.They knew with certainty that there is a world out there that's true to their wishes throwing themselves into the fact's vortex,diving into formation.And their wish is fulfilled.God knows how I hate them.
-Alchemist,I see you want to write destinies,I answered him at last.I realized I couldn't cheer him up so I asked him to excuse my presence for a moment.I had to take a good breath of fresh air.I remembered that after he discovered his solitude in the world,he broke from himself.In all this time till the breach he was intrusted in the dignity of human beings.He abandoned this dignity when transposed into existence it came up against resentment.He would have sacrificed himself for this dignity and even if he relinquished it in everyday interaction with others he locked it hard under an existential safety valve.The existence doesn't require from you to live in a dignified way,it asks you to bear it as you can.How can you live,he said to me when I asked him if a certain aspect of life doesn't makes us worthy of calling ourselves humans and disgrace ourselves.We are respectable as men only from time to time,he said to me.I didn't agree with him invoking the fact that we have an understanding,a judgement with what we form our values on an hierarchical system,I replied to him.Let me see you with your judgement standing under the executioner's knife,he crushed these words.It was then that I realized that this man is afraid to err in front of the world,afraid of its judgement.My friend,I told him,I know that it's hard for you to bear yourself especially in my presence but make a step forward and love you less.You have to understand that nobody will prostrate in front of your truth.Renounce to your watch tower and take down your wit into the market.It's the first place where you will be immediate measured.And you being lighter than a flake you'll be among stones.In your presence man himself is a stone that only you can lift it from the ground and throw it in the world's mirror.Thousands of broken pieces will reflect your personality.All of us will treat ourselves to your knowledge.This dictates you:my balance is diversity.Not the weight of a culture founds a way of living but the unity in all the cultures diversities.Find this unity.Weight get soon tired and like a stone is cast away in the making.Because everything is changeable.
We passed on the platform to refresh ourselves.I stared at him for few seconds.His skin was pale,his face transfigured.He took a strong decision.I feared for him at first but I recovered quickly knowing that his problem was to be solved only in one way:will he fight or not?If he will then the rest is silence.
Two weeks had passed since our last meeting and I hadn't heard anything from him till one evening I received a call from him saying to me that he finally made a big step in life.I didn't know what to expect from him.As I entered his room I exclaimed:You got beaten.His left cheek and forehead were swollen and deadly pale.Despite all this George was euphoric and was waiting to reveal his secret to me.It was nothing like a stone lifted from his chest but a confirmation that sounded like: Didn't I tell you?What happened,I asked him.He told me that he encountered a bum who with the money received from the people's pity that day was quenching his thirst in a secondhand pub where only unfriendly looks were upon you.I sat,he told me,at a remote table as I like to.'Except me there was another guy an the next table in that corner of the pub.After he starred at me for few seconds he stood up and came to my table asking me for permission to join me.I said yes as it was all the same to me.After a while in which the bum outlined his profile as if a curriculum vitae sent to a employer I asked him straight:I want you to kill me.He didn't asked why,what reasons I might have to come to ask him such a thing,he told me he has no problem to take the bottle of beer and break it into my head.But I will die quickly,I asked him thinking he knows what he does.Don't worry you will bleed to death.Do you have the power to do that,he asked him.Yes,he replied.Believing him capable i stretched my back as if getting rid of a heavy burden.He jumped at Puskin and his obscure point about his death and year of death.From the second beer we drank together at that table his convictions started to annoy me.If I was still at that table was because of his promise he would buy me a beer.After the vodka and the hot coffee I asked him firmly:let's fight.I was euphoric and I wanted this to happen all the way,to feel alive.The beggar looked at me irritated by my insistence on the matter,pulled me by my shoulder out in the parking area and punched me twice in the face knocking me down.In that instant I wrestled the existence,I was more than happy,it was my joy only.In that short instant I got back the right to life.The people in the bar jumped to my rescue but the beggar vanished.They asked me if I was all right and how on earth I came in his companionship and I lied to them saying that I was allright,in fact I hadn't been better,yes I told them I didn't think of him capable of lifting his hand upon me,in the way he did,without reason.I was lying and finding in it a complete delight.I was answering them with a serious look,I had to share my indignation with them while I knew I'm the only one to blame and find ecstazy in guilt.The next day I circled few times the pub in hope that I will meet the same beggar again to buy him a drink but this didn't happen.
I wouldn't have believed his words if somebody else would have told me the exact things.But he was standing in front of me and his bruises were the proof of his truth.And what truth! I couldn't have empathy for it.It was monstrous.He could reach and strangle me any moment.I knew he wouldn't do that.He had too many safey valve.I put on my hat and without saying a word I left the room.
It had passed more than a month when I got a call from him.His voice was unrecognizable,it had a lead weight and I wouldn't have recognized him as the same person.He was asking me to come by him.I didn't say no.In my mind there persisted the certainty that this man pose no threat to anyone.When he opened his appartment door his look struck me deep.He had lost considerable weight.I asked him if he is all right.He said to me he 's living in some kind of cycle.Cycle of nature,I tried to be ironically with him.Without saying a word he handed my a paper.What I have read in his appartment is reproduced here with exact words:
'Democracy builds the illusion that there is a struggle for power and a division of power in a state.The political games are a consequence of this kind of system.They create a false parity of chances.Democracy and culture cannot coexist.Democracy is an ersatz of equality when we know that people are anything but equals.Cultural production has no value in a democratic system,it loses the mission it was invested with and it becomes at best a materialistic value.New forms of culture spring in democracy: political culture,economic culture,environment culture,pop culture.The infusion of this so called cultures in the middle and lower classes is almost complete.This phenomenon gives birth to generations of politicians,economists,artists,activists,everyone more idealistic than the other trying to achieve the desideratum of a perfect democracy.This are ersatz cultures which hardly can be named cultures instead more appropriate it would be to call them mass idiocy.People are living these days in a dream created especially for them by other people.The purpose of democracy is to insure the survival of a race that degenerates with each generation,loses its tolerance to endure the existence,the living by stopping the mass production of ersatz and putting and end to the forced march of progress.We want to reproduce the living,to live forever without a halt forgetting that the perfect machinery is our body with its needs,diseases,and finally death.We still have a need for art but we forgot the relevant emotion,we forgot how to live art.We are the hangmen for the other when he considers himself more than a commodity.Poverty is a direct consequence of equality,of democracy itself.What I have today,you must want tomorrow.The slogan of a new democracy should sound:What we always had,i want today,you must want tomorrow.When the competition is removed the voice of majority strengthens in register.This majority considers its self entitled,becomes organic.Now is ready for moulding.Socialism joins the nationalism through culture.From this moment on you can talk about cultural supremacy.About this you are not allowed to talk in a democracy where we have a holy respect for the equality of principles,where you don't have the right to play with their liberty of conscience.Because they are free to believe in everything.They have this right.And anyone can listen but not to follow.'
At that time the democratic values blinded me.I didn't conceive a better system that democracy.I was lacking in good sense.I was working with stereotypes.One of them told me exactly that a totalitarian system is incompatible with human dignity.I was taught to stigmatize every usurpation of liberty in the public space.Who listened to me didn't have the right to abuse me.I learned in time to turn the other cheek and my belief in an equality driven to perfection jolted.My liberty was threatened.I couldn't sooth my already shabby conscience.The majority isn't perfect all the time,it lacks the critical dimension from inside.Majority doesn't know the wrong its doing in the decisional process.This majority doesn't know what's the real freedom,I concluded my monologue.
-Liberty is nothing more than a a point of view,an appearance and it doesn't stand in my nature to pine for freedom.
-You forgot the natural or ordinary bread,the living soul that craves,you became a stranger to life.
-Man passes through me and leaves no marks,I was revealing myself to George.I was truly beyond any subject.It happened about last Easter,on those sunny days I always loved,to lose myself through the empty streets of the town taking delight in strong coctails at the open terraces,sun and alcohol,a malefactor dementia.I couldn't endure the existence.I was sleeping allot,almost half a day,till noon,i couldn't stand mornings.Reality sucked me up as a black hole.The more I shined the more the pain that I was lost grew stronger.The truth doesn't have correspondence,it is made of individual elements.His origin however contradicted me.I didn't know this till later.I discovered my presence in the world after three days in a string in which spasmodic movements tore up my chest.I straightened my being towards good,i was nothing more but a shadow.This choice allowed me to live aesthetically in the world.After hole nights lost in front of the computer navigating on photography sites I purchased with my first money I received a camera.I gave up reading chasing shadows.Reality is black like coal an it soils our faces.Seldom we emerge from darkness to the light,like pitmen working in the depths of our souls.Good is a fallacy,nobody wants it.Who's the madman to wish for it?Love and mercy don't have room in our hearts,they aren't essentials for our lives.We have the right to ignore them,to work only for ourselves,to be ourselves.But this is the fundamental contradiction of a being that believes in nothing.Evil is allowed therefore.
-Hold it for a second and explain to me the argument once more.
-Some people choose not to do evil deeds given to them this choice because they are afraid of what might happen and it happens to them to be haunted by all the consequences they imagined.These men are a product of their environment and they live their lives through property.Some men pass on the evil side of life given to them this choice for they know it has no value of conscience being worthless in relationship with the other.This character is more likely a danger for himself.Some people embrace the evil and do bad deeds only because the carry out of a such deed is a conscience event that allows them to outshine the other as a normative value.This kind of character will bear the consequences of his deeds all his life regarding them as mistakes,being a week nature.Some people are good by nature.There people don't know the depths of the spirit,they are not profound.The rest of the people choose the evil side by virtue of their sluggishness but accomplices,listening blindly.Tell me now who has the right to remove the others without remorse,to kill if necessary.
-I understand now.Evil is allowed to those who have the strength to keep it under control and to produce it mechanical.Timing is essential.This is what we call genocide.The executioner is the supreme judge and justice at the same time.Who has the right to judge him?
-The majority.
-How perfect is this system?he asked me.
-To live isn't a fact without importance,my friend,its your primordial right in a state.But remember:the state in which you belong to as citizen,in the bosom of your nation.The majority or the tyrant decides upon your destiny.The absence of an organizing principle of judging the world and the others,the finding in violence of a last existential scope and the discharging of hate against the jews guilty of losing the pure and untainted self became a national religion.Nationalism culminated in the nazy Germany with the massacre of jews.These had no state,no voice neither in the state nor in the international community.The genocide even if it existed and can be proved mathematically cannot be incriminated.The jews belonged to nobody,no one to support them,to defend their case.
It was about an hour we had been talking.I excused myself and went out for a breath of fresh air.The dry air outside,the emotional discomfort in his presence pointed out my weak condition.The deposit of my arguments have been scattered by the incertitude in my voice.I headed my steps to the first terrace it reached my sight.I asked for a beer and I waited the alcohol to get to my head.I became lately suspicious of everybody.This state of mind weakened my judgement.Amplified by alcohol my conscience abandoned me in the euphory of ignorance.I rose to my feet and begin totter carefully towards the town's center.I stopped myself to lean on a fence.I was still standing up and as I remember I lost my good sense.The street view closed its angles,the lenght lost in extent,distances narrowed,the space was closing in my sight and focused in concentric points.Traces of light blended in circles spinning around me and I became dizzy.I couldn't make a move,it was darkness in daylight.I tried to articulate a word but this alter into a scream.I felt down.My eyes were burning coals.I saw myself moving away from the vegetative order and took shape from light.A bright light was invading me trying to overun the opacity of the organic.(The organic doesn't feel,it's a blind machine that knows what's vital and its command is unconditional.The absolute is the rising of the organic at a mind level.When this happens there is no hope.Its the road sign to totality.God doesn't send his protective angels anymore.Darkness spreads out over the history when its spirit decides who's going to live and who isn't.)I woke up in an ambulance knowing my guilt.I bore the tyranny of the organic for too long,my soul had been the clenching ground.The fight was still going but in a different register.The sin penetrated my being.This thing was keeping me alive.I couldn't look into another men eye without bleeding inside.I burst into tears when the medical assistance gripped my arm and injected glucose.This was the standard procedure.This was what i needed?No.I wanted to suffer without ceasing not because they made me feel better but because of Christ and his suffering.He was the light in my heart from now on and renunciation to intellect.They took me to a psychiatrist.Thank God it was a woman.They always knew how to talk with me,to knock the nonsense out of me.I jumped in right to the point.
-Without a sense of reality you cannot close an obsession.
-You are wrong.This conscience brought me to compulsion.The deepest you descent into organic,being witness at your own blood flow,a dreadful necessity,I tell you,nobody would like to know why a body bleeds.You admire yourself?You wouldn't like to know what you admire.Admiration is already a quality.
-Your projection as a different self is there,standing by,lurking and if you push yourself to the edge of your reason is unexpectedly your visitor.
-Why our conscience is unaware of the world's beauty?And why it lashes out when needed to transcend the daily existence?
-When you want something so bad and your conscience doesn't support you this means that your will is not free.You want over what your freedom won't permit.
-But this freedom you are talking about doesn't exist.They crushed my will.
-It's there as long as you compose yourself as an individual.
-I want that freedom I'm seeing far reaching.
-Be careful.You'll take in possession the far reaching and we don't want this to happen.Here take these pills and you will feel just fine.
Two years passed.All this time my wounded pride had tried hard to fight back.The power of the concept that digs into the flesh and lead the being to its summit,there I needed to be.The hours spent in prayers didn't help me to reach the top.The sin shuts the being in its own,in darkness.You draw near Christ with your heart full of piety.He is there always,ready to embrace you at his chest.The refusal of Christ doesn't anger nobody these days.We all have our freedom of conscience.
Time for evil
There is a insurmountable difference between being and purposefulness,a void between living and dying and those who want more from this life turn their prayers to the relentlessly time to give them a respite, to lengthen the distance between being and a goal that approached utterly into being, i.e., absorbed in the subjectivity,reveals our finite nature.Nature abounds with finality but only man may suspend the finality and thus prolong his life.But isn't this a contradiction? Man is part of nature that created us by virtue of a goal.We can create finite beings, humans have created a God and now clones,the unseen face of God,himself.And the clone cannot prescribe,judge but is.There is no limit in the nature of these creations, which says that what occurs naturally is supposed actually to happen, soothing eh,the limitation does not exist.God is not only necessary but also imperfect due to the impossibility of fulfilling its attributes in the world.Evil, war, disease, abnormality are as many forms of His imperfections.How do we explain the existence of so many failed models of nature?The Greeks placed the fulfillment of life under the sign of fatality.The ethical determinism came into the world that made it possible the understanding the necessity of the moral laws.Generating bans and interdictions ,the divinity prescribes the necessary formulas of being.For us the deadbeats.But how can you correct something that is the corrupt from birth by senses,by something that is necessary for life?After you have given these laws, people have begun to understand them.The science or the art of keeping us away from evil was lost or faded with the Book of the dead for the Exodus to master the science of committing crimes much sophisticated then the laws that ban them,moral crimes.The distribution of justice in the world is a divine act at home and man will decide which blood must be shed in the absence of a moral compass.Because I don't see how justice will be trickled along God in man without the knowledge acquired in advance of the divine attributes.An arrogance so long as all man claims is possession of full knowledge of the nature of the necessity for these laws, in other words the suitability to pass as a watch in the night .And what is needed is actually a ghost.History is only a confirmation of human possibilities to do evil.Evil has two faces, one objective which is recognized when people hurt each other and one subjective which really doesn't know what is wrong.Evil in its ignorance of cause cannot write a history.The finality of the evil is the world by no means that it needs to happen in the world compelling man (to defend himself?) but is the only way you can justify the moral laws.
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